it's a dark day

even though the sun is shining and it is a perfect spring day.

dark days can happen at any time and strike.

on my deep dark days all i want to do is hide someplace. and cry.

what i wouldn't give to just cry, and cry and cry....

last week I saw the pelicans flying overhead (or scelipans as Carolyne would call them)

next weekend is Mother's Day

it's time to open up the cabin for summer

and i have a lot on my mind.

i really miss you mom. really, really

what kind of world you wish for?

that song just played on my radio and i thought-
what kind of world WOULD i wish for?

good question- and like many good questions where does one start with an answer?

so i thought about it for a bit and all i could think of was this:

“If we could change ourselves, the tendencies in the world would also change. As a man changes his own nature, so does the attitude of the world change towards him. … We need not wait to see what others do.” Gandhi

i wish the world would stop and think about what they are doing and the impact it has -

yeah- stop and think - that's is what i would wish for

won't give up

i have been very taken with the new jason mraz single "i won't give up" pretty powerful lyrics and message

and it got me to thinking about life and where i am and who i am

i am a woman who will fight for what i believe in

i will speak out loud for a cause

i am not seeking fame or fortune or popularity

i will fight for my family - against cancer, against insurance companies, against injustice

i support my children when they think for themselves and make their own decisions even if i don't agree

our differences shouldn't tear us apart it should bring us closer together

and my family is more than the people i am related to

i'm your friend till the bitter end

i won't give up

it needs to be said

this was the status on a friend's facebook page today ...
 

Things that are hard to say but are entirely good to say:

 

 

 

pretty insightful for an 18 year old - and oh so wise

it's raining and i don't have an umbrella

some days i walk around with my own personal cloud hanging over my head and it's only raining on me.

and i don't want to do anything except stay in bed with the quilt up over my head

i can see a little patch of blue sky through the window and i can watch it for hours and hours

but it never gets closer to me

the sun is shining outside

but inside it's raining

and I don't have an umbrella

keeping it real

i read somewhere that sometimes things have to fall apart before they can fall together.
what i want to know is how often do they have to fall apart?
it seems to me that as soon as i get it all together something happens to rip it all apart.
then i have to reassemble the pieces and hope i can make them fit.

and sometimes they don't all fit together

and sometimes i have a piece left over

what do i do with it?

is it any wonder why i am angry, confused, worried, frustrated and sad?

i can't sleep

can't think

can't focus

i have so many questions and NO answers!

are you there god? it's me laura and we need to talk.....

Happiness is......

"I think I'm afraid to be happy, because whenever I get too happy, something bad always happens."--Charlie Brown