Thursday, April 15, 2010

it's a roller coaster ride and you can't get off

the funny thing about depression is the highs and lows.it's been a pretty good few days for me. life isn't so gray and i've been able to really focus on some pretty good stuff. the meds are supposed to even things out but some times meds just can't block certain things. like the calander from moving forward and move it has because i looked at it and saw that tomorrow is April 16th and nine years ago i sat in the doctors office with my mother and heard him tell her she had cancer and they didn't know where it orginated from. three months later she was dead.

can we stop now? i'd like to get off...

Thursday, April 8, 2010

rhymes with orange

nothing rhymes with orange- that's why orange is such a weird word. it doesn't know where it fits in. it's a color it's a flavor it's a fruit. and you can't make up a silly song that rhymes with it and it's hard to use in poetry. if i say i am feeling blue or everything is rosy you know what i mean. i can feel peachy and there is the apple of my eye. there is black comedy and everyone wants to go green. brown rhymes with a lot of words and everyone wants to be in the pink but not thought of as yellow. but orange? today I feel like orange... 'nuff said.

Monday, April 5, 2010

dark days

I have a student who is pretty cool. He's different and a bit of a misfit but then I find that most of my art students are like that. I'm a misfit too! One day he wandered into the studio and I asked how hios day was going. He sat down and said I'm having a dark day. All I want to do it talk. So we did. I totally understand a 'dark day'. And it seems that depresison and being creative are connected. Talking helps when I am feeling dark.